Slowly,calmly I was walking up the hill. When it was going to be sunset I would sit down and gaze at it until it was completely out of sight. Suddenly, when the sunset was nearly over a light was so bright that it looked like I was blind.
After 15 minutes I woke up and stared at everyone.
“Where am I ?” I said looking confused.
” You are in a space ship,” they said
I stared at them ,who looked like humans and wore ridiculous t- shirts and jeans.
“It’s nearly the end of the world. And you can save the world. I stared at them surprised….
mrslathamsclass 
Maysun, you have written a very imaginative story with good descriptive language. I like the fact that you have left the reader in suspense.
Well done.
Mrs Mitchell 100wc team
You’ve made me want to read more, well done, Maysun! Some great sentence starts but be careful of your tenses, your second sentence is a little muddled.
* Good punctuation.
* Good choice of word
Ebi finish the story