One scorching hot day with metallic,grey clouds 3 Rhino’s were determined to cross the broken bridge to get food.The baby went first and started to stomp on the bridge.
“Who’s that stomping on my bridge!”said the serpent.The baby Rhino convinced him to take him across.A little while later, the female stomped on the bridge.She also convinced the glistening sea serpent to take her across.
Next the huge,tough Rhino went.The sea serpent said the Same as he did to the others.”There is a much bigger Rhino coming”said the dad!Finally the Rhino killed the serpent!
mrslathamsclass 
*awesome adjectives in the start
*great exclamation marks
EBI if you didn’t make it small
Some really beautiful writing, here. You’ve used some excellent descriptive words like ‘metallic’ and ‘glistening’. Was the serpent helping them across the stretch of water where the bridge ended? Such a pity such a kind serpent ended up being killed!